


Please Don't Leave Me

by Jubokko, LazarusII



Series: KakaIru One-Shots to Heal (or Break) Your Heart [7]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Established KakaIru, Iruka needs a hug, KakaIru Fest, Kakashi is Late at Everything, M/M, POV Umino Iruka, Sad, Sad with a Happy Ending, Whump, kakairu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:22:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26378737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jubokko/pseuds/Jubokko, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LazarusII/pseuds/LazarusII
Summary: Tears slipped down Iruka’s cheeks, forming glittering trails through the thick layers of ash covering his skin. In the distance, he could hear explosions—deafening bursts of sound that punctuated the wails and screams of the battlefield. His hands gripped the navy fabric of the jounin’s uniform, feeling the damp stickiness of blood slipping between his fingers as he tightened his hold.He wanted to scream, to join the desperate song of misery and despair that echoed about the village ruins. But that wouldn’t do anything.It wouldn’t defeat the Akatsuki.It wouldn’t bring comfort to the young Akimichi sobbing beside him.It wouldn’t mend the shattered pieces of his heart.And it wouldn’t bring Kakashi back.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka
Series: KakaIru One-Shots to Heal (or Break) Your Heart [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1821832
Comments: 15
Kudos: 113
Collections: KakaIru Week 2020, Squeesh





	Please Don't Leave Me

**Author's Note:**

> Yo!  
> This is for KakaIru-Fest’s [“KakaIru Week 2020”](https://kakairu-fest.tumblr.com/post/620892953857146880/were-excited-to-reveal-the-prompts-for-kakairu)! 
> 
> The prompt that I chose for this was _Thanks_. It was supposed to be for September 10th's prompt, but... well this work took a bit longer than I expected (and irl things)!  
> A huge thank you to [42](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BooleanWildcard) for beta-reading this work! Please note that any mistakes that got posted are my own :))
> 
>  **Quick warning that this fic is pretty heavy and may contain mild triggers for anxiety/panic attacks. It DOES have a happy ending as indicated in the tags!  
> **  
>  Please let me know in the comments, or dm me if you have any issues with this! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy 💖

The ground floor of the hospital had been completely purged of all unnecessary elements. Stools, plants, decorations, paintings—they’d all been cast out the rear exit in a heap, haphazardly thrown out the moment mass casualties were reported. 

The smooth tile was now barely visible beneath a vast expanse of temporary beds and wounded shinobi, fallout of the devastating conflict with the Akatsuki. Medical ninja flitted between the prone forms, the green glow of their jutsu illuminating the air. 

Every so often, the ground would rumble, causing the lights to flicker ominously, small trickles of plaster and ceiling tile falling through the air as the medcenter was plunged into a state of semi-darkness. Everything seemed to stop in those moments, as if the entire world had come to a standstill, holding its breath as the distant roar echoed from the remnants of the city. 

Iruka staggered through the double doors and into the chaos within, nodding to the chunin and jounin guards as he passed. Sweat trickled down his face with the effort of supporting the unconscious, injured shinobi on his back.

He hadn’t taken two steps through the door before the ground shook again, rocking violently beneath Iruka’s feet. 

A resounding _boom_ echoed loudly throughout the hastily-staged medcenter, as a wave of hot air and dust blasted from the entrance behind him. Several wounded shinobi groaned, and a kunoichi writhed in place, hands pressed against the sides of her heavily-bandaged head. 

Stumbling slightly, Iruka gritted his teeth and pressed on. He nearly made it all the way down the cleared impromptu walkway when his battered left knee finally gave out. Grunting, Iruka cursed aloud as the floor rushed towards him—

Sakura’s steady hands caught him, and green eyes gazing into Iruka’s—filled with worry and a trace of fear. 

“Thank you, Sakura,” he said softly, as he regained his balance. 

She nodded in response. 

“We have a spot for him over here, sensei.” Sakura guided Iruka towards one of the unoccupied beds. 

As he followed the pink-haired girl, Iruka heard the pair of shinobi guarding the entrance muttering, their voices carrying across the room. Iruka noted their stiff posture and serious faces. The jounin had a kunai drawn, and was holding it in a white-knuckled grip. 

They were afraid. _Very_ afraid. 

_But, then again, we all are,_ Iruka thought. 

A wave of nausea washed across Iruka, and he sank his teeth into his bottom lip. He’d been fighting the tightness in his chest for some time now, a void sitting at the base of his throat, constricting his breathing. 

Iruka _knew_ that he should be afraid for the sake of the Leaf, for Konoha’s future and the Land of Fire—for Naruto. But when Iruka searched his feelings, he could only find one thing, one _person._

Kakashi.

The shinobi he was carrying shifted slightly, nearly throwing Iruka off-balance a second time, forcing him to adjust his grip on the man. Iruka’s head pounded with the movement, muscles burning as he supported the limp body. 

He forced his feet to move, to keep himself going. That was his job. 

Squeezing his eyes tight shut, Iruka forced himself to relax. He would be no use to anyone if he panicked. 

_That’s right,_ he told himself bitterly. _Kakashi has his job—and I have mine._

“Iruka sensei?” Sakura was staring at him, her green eyes wide and concerned. 

Blinking up at her, Iruka shook his head. 

“My apologies,” he replied, offering her a smile. 

Slowly, he moved into a crouch and gently lowered the injured shinobi onto the blankets.

* * *

The moment Iruka stepped out of the hospital, he could feel death hanging in the air, stifling and oppressive—a feeling only compounded by the faint screams and cries echoing through the village. Off to his left, there came the sound of fighting, shouts and massive dust clouds billowing upwards from the live battlefield. 

Iruka’s gut twisted. It was so close, and Kakashi was probably at its center, fighting for the Leaf—for Naruto… for _everyone_ … 

Swallowing, Iruka channeled chakra into his feet and leaped onto the nearest building. _Kakashi will be fine,_ he told himself.

The bitter aftertaste of hope weighed heavily on Iruka’s mind as he continued his search for wounded shinobi. 

  
  


* * *

Iruka had no way of telling when the explosions ended-- all he knew was that suddenly the village was _too_ quiet. 

From where he stood in the middle of one of the decimated streets of Konoha’s former shopping district, Iruka could’ve heard a pin drop. Iruka felt his skin _crawl_. Silence was never good, especially not in a warzone. 

His mind cooked up images from his worst nightmares: Kakashi, lifeless and sprawled out on the ground—Kakashi, dying slowly as Iruka struggled to reach him—Kakashi… 

Balling up his fists, Iruka shook himself. 

_Kakashi will be fine._

* * *

Choji found Iruka standing in the ruins of Konoha’s shopping district, battered and bloodied with unshed tears glittering in Akimichi's dark eyes. 

As Iruka turned to greet the young shinobi, the tears fell, streaming freely down the boy’s face.

“I’m sorry, sensei…” 

Iruka already knew what it meant, he didn’t even need to ask. It was like someone had filled every muscle in his body with lead, dragging him down into the rubble of the destroyed city. 

For a moment, Iruka held Choji’s gaze, and then his eyes fell. 

“Where is he?” Iruka’s voice was a whisper, his voice tight. 

Choji hesitated, and then turned, head bowed. 

Numb, his arms limp at his sides, Iruka followed the Akimichi boy, barely aware of anything other than the pain expanding inside his chest, and the terrible blank void which consumed his mind. 

The Akimichi clan were all grouped near the hospital entrance, scattered about on makeshift beds, the building clearly having reached capacity while Iruka was out. The clan members looked rather worse for wear, and were mostly seated on the ground. Many of them were still being treated by Godaime’s summon—Katsuyu—the greenish halo of medical jutsu visible where the white slugs had discovered injuries. 

Iruka’s attention, however, was quickly drawn elsewhere. 

In a daze, Iruka felt his body move, one foot slowly stepping before the other, carrying him forward. 

Choza was off to the side, farthest from the hospital entrance, leaned against a great big pile of rubble, a slug curled over one shoulder. The medical summon’s green light illuminated his pale complexion. Beside him, though—

Iruka drifted closer, eyes wide, his mind refusing to comprehend what he was seeing. It wasn’t real—it _couldn’t_ be real. 

Somewhere off in the distance, the battlefield began to speak once more, a sharp, echoing staccato in Iruka’s ears. 

Kakashi could’ve been sleeping, his face relaxed and oddly _peaceful_ despite the large patches of dried blood plastered to his face and caked in his hair. 

Tears slipped down Iruka’s cheeks, forming small glittering trails that cut through the thick layers of ash covering his skin. 

Sinking to his knees, Iruka’s hands gripped the navy fabric of the jounin’s uniform, feeling the cold, damp stickiness of blood slipping between his fingers as he tightened his hold. More than anything, Iruka wanted to scream, to join the desperate song of misery and despair which echoed from the battlefield. But that wouldn’t do anything. 

It wouldn’t defeat the Akatsuki. 

It wouldn’t bring comfort to the young Akimichi sobbing beside him. 

It wouldn’t mend the shattered pieces of his heart. 

And it wouldn’t bring Kakashi back. 

Loneliness crashed down onto his mind, dragging his body down into the earth. He felt dizzy, faint—nausea churning in the depths of his stomach. 

The screams were growing louder—a cacophony of voices and other noises rising in a crescendo of sound. 

Through eyes blurred by emotion, Iruka watched the clouds of destruction roll towards him. 

_Another explosion?_ He wondered faintly. 

Was it the end? 

Something large blotted out the sun and slid over his body—cold, yet oddly warm in a strange way. Struggling to breathe, Iruka cried out as the ground shot up towards him. 

The hand on Kakashi’s shirt slipped, and Iruka panicked for a moment before he found the jounin’s arm. 

A deafening roar filled the air, and Iruka let out a yell as the sound cut into his eardrums. 

He went down face-first, hurriedly shoved by the _something_ behind him, head cracking painfully against the rubble as he slammed to the ground. 

The last thing that he felt was a strange, heavy weight pressing down on top of him and the feeling of Kakashi’s uniform beneath his fingers. 

* * *

  
  


Iruka awoke to one of the worst headaches of his entire life. Groaning, he dragged an arm upwards in order to cradle his forehead. Even the slightest movement sent waves of agony flaring behind his eyes. 

The weight that had been on top of him was moving, slowly sliding off his body. Eyes squeezed shut, Iruka could only groan, feeling something hot and sticky near his right temple. 

“Let me.” A soft, female voice sounded right next to him, and Iruka suppressed the urge to flinch. Before he could respond, or offer any sort of resistance, a warm tingling enveloped his throbbing skull; a strong, yet soothing presence. 

_Katsuyu_ , Iruka realized stupidly. Of _course_ it was. 

And then he remembered. 

Eyes flying open, Iruka felt his heart thunder against his chest. His left hand was still clenched, the fingers closed around Kakashi’s—

His chest constricted so badly that he gagged, choking. 

“Breathe, shinobi-san.” Katsuyu’s voice cut into Iruka like a knife, and he shuddered, pressing his free hand into the ground. 

Slowly, and painfully, Iruka pushed himself upright, reluctantly relinquishing his hold on Kakashi’s uniform as he realized just how _weak_ he was. 

“Please move slowly,” Katsuyu instructed softly, following his movements, “this should only take a few more minutes.”

Suddenly, Iruka became aware of several things in quick succession: first, that Godaime’s summon was _huge_ , and second—that he, Kakashi, and Choza were all lying in what appeared to be a massive field of pure wreckage. Katsuyu was everywhere, white slugs slowly moving across his vision to reveal the shinobi she’d been protecting. 

Iruka’s eyes went wide, and his jaw dropped as he took in the pure destruction around him. It was all _gone_ —everything but the stone faces. Plumes of smoke rose from the village that now resembled a gigantic stone basin of rubble, obscuring the majority of the city and horizon to the South. 

“Shortly after the explosion destroyed the village, Naruto started fighting Pain,” Katsuyu murmured. “He is strong.” 

_Naruto…_ Iruka suddenly felt a wave of fatigue wash across him. 

Failure, all of them had failed—he’d failed to protect Naruto, to _be there_ for Kakashi when the man had needed him the most… overcome by dizziness, Iruka slowly pitched forward, eyes falling closed. He could hear voices, stentorian and garbled beyond comprehension. 

“I got you—easy—” Katsuyu somehow gently lowered Iruka back to the ground. “Please do not move too quickly.” 

At some point, Iruka knew that he’d gotten to his feet and started moving about, but it was as though his brain no longer knew how to process what was happening around him. His body was on autopilot, moving wherever he was needed. 

It was his duty to help others. 

He was a shinobi; there was a point when his own losses and emotions had to be set aside, and where his duty began. 

The hospital was safe, _somehow_ , protected by both shino’s bugs and an odd array of jutsu that Iruka couldn’t quite make out. 

Katsuyu was bustling about and healing shinobi, but there were too many dead, too many bodies yet to be discovered, shinobi that she hadn’t been able to protect in time. While he helped as best as he could, Iruka watched the world through dull eyes, following an endless cycle of moving debris, wounded shinobi, and the dead. 

Iruka was in the process of helping move Choza back towards the hospital entrance when the lights came. He watched the green ribbons fill the sky, snaking across the village, screened by the smoke and dust still hanging in the air. 

After the lights came the screams, echoing from the remnants of the hospital and reverating around the village. This time, however, they weren’t the same tones of despair and grief. 

The first emotion that ran through Iruka was confusion. 

He blinked. 

Confusion soon gave way to shock as Iruka saw a nearby woman abruptly sit bolt upright, gasping. The kunoichi had been declared _dead_ only minutes ago, gutted by an Akatsuki member.

Iruka nearly dropped Choza. 

The moment the Akimichi jounin had been safely transferred into the hands of a rather battered-looking medic, Iruka turned and began to sprint back towards Kakashi, heart thundering in his chest--there was no way— _no way_. 

Iruka screeched to a halt, skidding around a large pile of rubble. 

Kakashi was in the same spot, Choji silently sitting vigil nearby, head bowed with his arms and legs folded tight to his body. 

A lump rose in Iruka’s throat as he approached the pair, and swallowed back the unbearable anticipation as he sank to his knees at the jounin’s side. 

He looked at Choji and the young Akimichi shook his head, expression tightening. 

The hand that Iruka clasped was cold, and devoid of life. Wordlessly, Iruka laced his fingers between Kakashi’s and waited. 

Minutes seemed to drag by like centuries, as if time had somehow ground to a stop, holding Iruka in an infinite state of limbo. Caught up in the storm of his own mind, Iruka closed his eyes, feeling tears threatening to fall down his face once more.

“Please…” He whispered, “please don’t leave me.” 

He clenched his jaw at the gasps and cheers sounding from behind him, the families suddenly reunited, the friends revived by the mysterious jutsu. 

Choji started crying again, Iruka could hear the heaving sobs. Taking a deep breath, Iruka locked down every bit of self control over his mind. He couldn’t look, couldn’t bear to open his eyes... 

He would wait, no matter how long it took. 

And if Kakashi didn’t come back—

Gently, Iruka unlaced his fingers from Kakashi’s.

He wouldn’t break here, he couldn’t, not when everyone was celebrating—not when Choji was right there… Years of dealing with grief, teaching, and containing his emotions were all that stood between him and complete breakdown—and even then, it was a narrow margin. 

Iruka’s breath hitched. 

There came a slight crunch of gravel from in front of Iruka and he froze, hardly daring to breathe. 

Heart pounding, Iruka slowly leaned back his head, and let out a shaky breath before cracking his eyes open slightly. 

A hand was cupping his cheek. 

“You know… I’d never leave you…” Kakashi’s words were raw and grated. 

Iruka looked into the warm, tired gaze of his partner, and felt every last drop of energy leave him. He crumpled into Kakashi's arms, tears sliding down his face. 

“Thank you,” Iruka whispered into the jounin’s chest. 

_Thank you for coming back to me._

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on Tumblr [here](https://lazarusii.tumblr.com/)  
> Thank you so much for reading :))  
> Hope you have an amazing rest of your week!


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